Koreans rarely call people “you.” Instead, they use 씨 or 님 after a name, job titles, 선배 for seniors, and family words like 언니 and 오빠, even for friends. Which one you choose depends on age, gender, and how close you are.
Level: Beginner · TOPIK 1-2
Getting this right is one of the fastest ways to sound natural in Korean. Getting it wrong is one of the fastest ways to sound rude without knowing why. Here is how each word works, and where learners usually slip.
Name + 씨: Polite, but Not for Everyone
씨 goes after a name and makes it polite. It is the standard choice for coworkers and acquaintances around your age. How you attach it changes the feeling.
| Form | Example | Feeling |
|---|---|---|
| Given name + 씨 | 지수 씨 | ✅ The usual choice |
| Full name + 씨 | 박지수 씨 | Cold between people who know each other. Used at hospitals or government offices, where 박지수 님 is even more common |
| Family name + 씨 | 박 씨 | ❌ Mostly heard in rural villages, or as a joking nickname between close friends. Avoid |
씨 is not for people clearly above you. Koreans simply don’t call a teacher or a boss by name + 씨. If someone did, it would sound like they were angry and had stopped caring about being polite, like an employee who is ready to quit.
지수 씨, 오늘 점심 같이 먹어요.
jisu ssi, oneul jeomsim gachi meogeoyo.
Jisu, let’s have lunch together today. (To a coworker your age.)
(To your department head) 김민호 씨, 회의 시작할까요?
부장님, 회의 시작할까요?
bujangnim, hoei sijakalkkayo?
Shall we start the meeting?
Titles + 님: The Safe Choice at Work and School
For teachers, bosses, and clients, Koreans use the job title plus 님. The title replaces both the name and “you.”
| Title | Who |
|---|---|
| 선생님 | Teachers, and also doctors |
| 팀장님, 부장님 | Team leader, department head |
| 사장님 | Company president, or the owner of a shop or restaurant |
| 고객님 | Customer (used by staff) |
Name + 님 at work and online
Many younger companies and online communities use name + 님 for everyone, whatever their position. It is more polite than 씨 and avoids the question of who is senior.
junho nim, jaryo bonae jusyeoseo gamsahamnida.
Junho, thank you for sending the file.
선배 and 후배: Seniors at School and Work
선배 is someone who started school or the company before you. 후배 is someone who started after you. Age matters less than who came first.
seonbaenim, i sueop eottaeyo?
How is this class? (To a senior student.)
Use 선배님 at first. Once you are close, plain 선배 is common and still polite. 후배 works differently. People rarely call someone “후배” to their face. Some say 후배님 as a joke, but usually you just use their first name. If your 후배 is older than you, use their first name + 누나, 오빠, 언니, or 형 (like 지수 누나).
You will hear 후배 when someone introduces a junior to another person.
yeogineun je hubaeyeyo.
This is my junior from school (or work).
Between friends, the casual version is 내 후배야.
언니, 오빠, 누나, 형: Not Just for Family
These words mean “older sister” and “older brother,” but Koreans use them for older friends too. The right word depends on your gender, not only theirs.
| You are… | Older woman | Older man |
|---|---|---|
| a woman | 언니 | 오빠 |
| a man | 누나 | 형 |
hyeong, ibeon jumare chukguhallae?
Want to play soccer this weekend? (A man to an older male friend.)
When you start using these words, the relationship feels closer, and sometimes casual speech follows, though not always. Wait until the friendship is comfortable, or until the other person suggests it. 오빠 can also sound affectionate, which is why many women call an older boyfriend 오빠.
When You Don’t Know What to Call Someone
For strangers, Koreans usually avoid names and titles altogether. These three cover most daily situations.
jeogiyo, igeo tteoreotteurisyeosseoyo.
Excuse me, you dropped this.
sajangnim, kadeu dwaeyo?
Do you take cards? (To the owner or staff of a small shop.)
imo, yeogi banchan jom deo juseyo.
Could we get more side dishes? (To an older woman working at a casual restaurant.)
이모 literally means “aunt.” In casual restaurants it sounds warm, but in a formal place, 저기요 is safer.
Common Mistakes
1. Using a family word too early
Calling someone 언니 or 형 the first time you meet can feel too familiar. It also assumes they are older than you, which can sound like “you look old.” Start with name + 씨 or a title. When you are closer, ask first: 형이라고 해도 돼요? (“Can I call you 형?”).
2. Calling a senior by name
If someone is your 선배, using their name + 씨 sounds distant or even cold. Use 선배님 or 선배.
3. Adding 님 to yourself
님 shows respect to others. Never add it to your own name or title.
저는 에밀리 님이에요.
저는 에밀리예요.
jeoneun emilliyeyo.
I’m Emily.
🗣️ Try It Today
Pick one and use it with a Korean friend today.
사장님, 여기 물 좀 주세요.
sajangnim, yeogi mul jom juseyo.
Could I get some water, please?저기요, 주문할게요.
jeogiyo, jumunhalkkeyo.
Excuse me, I’d like to order.선배님, 커피 한잔하실래요?
seonbaenim, keopi hanjanhasillaeyo?
Would you like to grab a coffee?언니라고 해도 돼요?
eonnirago haedo dwaeyo?
Can I call you 언니? (A woman to an older woman. Men can ask 누나라고 해도 돼요?)우리 말 편하게 할까요?
uri mal pyeonhage halkkayo?
Shall we talk casually? (When you’ve become close.)
Quick Quiz
✏️ What should you call them?
- You are a man. Your close friend is a woman two years older.
- Your coworker, 이수진, is your age.
- Someone who joined your club a year before you.
- You want the owner’s attention at a small café.
👉 Show answers
- 누나. A man calls an older woman 누나.
- 수진 씨. 이수진 씨 sounds cold, and 이 씨 is never used here.
- 선배님, or 선배 once you are close.
- 사장님, or 저기요.
Summary
Use name + 씨 for people around your age, titles + 님 for teachers and bosses, and 선배 for anyone who started before you. Save 언니, 오빠, 누나, and 형 for older friends you are comfortable with. With strangers, 저기요 and 사장님 are the safest starting points.
📘 Start with the basics How to Say “You” in Korean: Why 너 Can Sound Rude Why Koreans rarely say “you,” and when 너 is OK. Read the basics →